Sweet Surrender in Real Life

Before I even knew it, I decided to dedicate this entire month to the practice of surrendering and letting go. And boy, have I had many opportunities for both this month! Yesterday I said "see you later" to my esteemed colleagues, many of whom I have worked with for almost 7 years advising pre-college immigrant and refugee students from over 35 different countries as they began or continued their educational journeys here in the United States with English classes. Now I have been given a new opportunity in a different college to help students plan their education and future careers through individual advising, coaching, and leading workshops. I feel as though I have been working towards this new adventure for some time now and I look forward to gaining more coaching and workshop experience while helping more students achieve their goals.

From going through all the papers, files, emails, and memories I have accumulated in almost 7 years and feeling so loved and appreciated by many who I have shared the best and worst of times with, I have realized that what really stays with us from an important life experience is who we got to know and what they shared with us or what we learned from them. The inspiring stories of courage from students who fought their way to make a better life here in the United States, the uplifting passion projects of colleagues that have motivated me to work on my very own passion project, the daily care, concern and support from cherished friendships turned lifelong kindred spirits, the vast range of perspective on living life, and the inner awareness gained from all of these experiences are what I want to take with me from this.

So I must keep that in mind as I go through material items, because these items can be replaced or found again, if needed. But they do not compare to the priceless value of friendships made and lessons learned that I will take with me wherever I go in life. No one can take that away from me, it can't be lost or misplaced, it has become a part of me, and I am a better person for it.

Letting go requires A LOT of faith. I must trust that what I wrote is true--I will not lose the value of the many kindred friendships and invaluable lessons I take away from the past 7 years. I trust that these experiences, this wisdom, all the support I feel will help me move forward and help guide me in this new adventure. Nothing is lost. And so much has been gained. From moving on in my career, I am now able to reflect and see these past experiences with a little bit of distance which makes me more aware of all I have gained. And for that, I am grateful.

Gratitude helps us through transitions in life. I am a little nervous about all the unknown that lies ahead but I am also confident that I have what it takes and will be supported on this journey, no matter what. And that's a really good feeling.

What's Your Passion Project?

Today I had a wonderful conversation over lunch with my dear friend, Susan, and among many inspiring topics, we talked about the term, "passion project" that I've heard several times recently. I think I first read this term in Oprah's magazine, which I collected several months worth for my recent collage sessions. There was an article about Drew Barrymore and how her passion project was finding hearts in nature and photographing them. She then made them into a book. And just yesterday, Facebook advertised a new animated film coming out based on the very famous book, The Prophet. When I read about it further, I discovered that this movie was the passion project of Salma Hayek. 

I feel really inspired by this new term and also inspired that famous people, like Drew and Salma are giving back through their inspiring art and passion. 

Susan and I thought it would be neat to ask people we first meet, instead of the common "what do you do?" question, what their passion project is. I'm curious what we'd find out. I mean, I just heard this term but I've been intrigued by it and have started to think about how I'd answer that question too.

I think ever since my participation in the Fun-A-Day project in January, or since I began to write weekly blogs last August, I have been developing my passion project. And learning to own my gift or dependable strength of creativity through my Dependable Strengths training in October acted like a propeller for me! I think there is a creative or reflective process, at least for me, of naming my project, and now that I look back, I can see how it's grown and gotten more defined through my experiences.

Really, when I look back, I began this journey way back. Recently I was looking back on the time when I had a volunteer internship in Quito, Ecuador and I worked with young children who were working to help support their families. I remember teaching workshops to help boost their self-esteem, and I still have a picture of the posters the children made on "Que significa la felicidad?" or "What does happiness mean?" This work was very meaningful for me, and still is. After offering a collage workshop nearly two weeks ago and an introduction to Dependable Strengths workshop last week, I have heard very inspiring feedback, which leads me to believe that this work is also helping lift individuals' self-esteem, and that fills me with happiness.

That means I'm meeting my number 1 goal of helping lift people up and helping them feel better, even if just for a little bit. A little bit here, a little bit there starts to add up. That is how I started really studying stress management and wellness. And at a certain point, I decided to fully dive into this work and learn all I can. Now I'm beginning to see the budding fruits of my labor--or studies, and my creative energy bursts are growing in frequency. 

I can't wait to see what comes next!

So you're probably asking: what exactly is my passion project then? All this talk and I haven't named it quite yet. And I'm learning, through the power of daily affirmations, that naming what you want in life is key. 

So here goes--back in February I think, I was brainstorming creative ideas with my bestie, Andrea while at the Korean women's spa--a great place for inspiration! And the idea of offering a series of creative stress management techniques emerged. 

I love being creative and I also find it extremely helpful in managing daily stresses, and I enjoy researching wellness and stress management topics, so this felt right to me. 

My first official workshop in early May at Edmonds Community College was entitled "Creative Stress Management Through Collage Art." I decided to name it with my passion project idea in mind, and it became much more than a passing collage session I offered on a professional development day at work. It became the first part of my Creative Stress Management workshop series. :)

So my suggestion to anyone thinking about their passion project: get started! Do one small--or big--thing towards your dream. Don't wait for the perfect time or place. Just begin. If anything, you'll learn a lot from trying something out. And you may get further inspiration for the next step.

My next step? I would like to invite interested friends over soon--set a date, Marita--within the next month to share stories through the beginning part of the Dependable Strengths process and then collage about our strengths. I'm still working on the title, but it could be something like "Creative Stress Management Through Storytelling." Plus collage. But for my friends, I'll probably call it a "Strengths Collage gathering" or something like that. :)

What's your passion project?

*Photograph taken in Lake Forest Park on beautiful Lake Washington near where I blogged today from my iPhone. 

Feeding My Soul With Creative Energy

I am realizing that I used to give out my creative energy more freely or uncontrollably but not in ways that refilled my spirit with this ever precious energy force. I have discovered that saving my creative energy for dancing, teaching, praying, making art, brainstorming, cooking, dreaming, and loving is a much better use of this powerful energy, and the responses from others are so much more affirming. As a creative free spirited individual, I have sometimes felt misunderstood and not quite known how to remedy this or explain my at times quirky ways, but one very important lesson I took from my 5-day Dependable Strengths training last October is that in order to reach my goals and lead a more fulfilling life, I must truly OWN my strengths, and creativity is definitely one of my most reliable and natural strengths. 

Expressing my creative side brings me so much joy and I feel like I'm at home in myself in these moments of creative flow. I think after going through the Dependable Strengths process, I have a greater awareness of my almost physical and most certainly emotional and spiritual need to express my creativity. I regularly look for opportunities now to express this gift to the world. 

I spent the greater part of 7 years attending many personal and professional development workshops, and now I'm finally coming into my own and creating my own workshops! It feels so amazing to start with an idea, begin planning and brainstorming, and then see it to fruition! And positively impact others' lives. That is the greatest gift--to bring a new perspective and learn to appreciate my own natural qualities in the process.

So just to give you an idea of how strong my need to be creative is, here is just a snapshot of my latest creative endeavors in the past week or so:

• Tonight I'm writing and reflecting while outside in nature by a beautiful stream.
• Earlier today I brainstormed about a new workshop to combine strengths identification and collaging...stay tuned!
• This morning I facilitated an Introduction to Dependable Strengths workshop in a high-intermediate English class for immigrants and refugees from all over the globe.
• Yesterday I made a beaded bracelet for my dear friend's birthday.
• On Monday, I made a rainbow stir-fry with leftover vegetables from the farmer's market and created a kaleidoscope of colors and of course, photographed it.
• On Saturday, I met a creative kindred spirit for an impromptu pre-Mother's Day collage get-together to create gifts for our moms.
• On Friday I led a collaging session at the annual building community/professional development day at work.
• Last Thursday I visited the art museum with my good friend and we happily geeked out analyzing Joan Miró's art. :)
• Last week I created several collage pages on my own and in the company of friends.
• Nearly everyday I feel compelled to photograph nature's beauty and share this art with friends and family through social media and sometimes on this blog.

These varied creative endeavors feed my soul and spirit and help me stay grounded in the present, so even when I'm tired, I feel pumped full with energy and excited to share my light in the world through my spiritual gift of creativity.

Gorgeous flower my mom and I saw on Mother's Day while picking out a flower basket for her 

Bracelet I made for my amiga querida, Tami 

Mother's Day collage book for my dear mom 

Rainbow stir-fry creation 

My collage pages created during the session I led for Building Community Day 

Amazing collaging crew on Building Community Day...over 20 co-workers attended!

What's one of your spiritual gifts? Or an inner strength that fills you with joy when you utilize it? Please share below. I love hearing about people's strengths!

Practicing Letting Go Through Collaging

Funny, I've been reading about the benefits of collaging to prepare for a session I'm leading at the end of the week for a campus community event on collage art as a creative stress management tool, and several sources say that collage art is recommended when you're feeling stressed and feeling a lack of control over your present situation. This is because in collaging you get to control which pictures and words you choose to include in your unique expression of art. You're in charge, and this process of creating gives you the sense of control that you felt you were lacking beforehand. 

At the same time, through my own collage creations, I'm finding that collaging has helped me let go and just soak in the art that I'm creating. I let go of a need to strive for perfection or stress about where each piece will go in the collage. There are really no rules when I collage and this is a very freeing and forgiving process as a result. I am in charge because it’s my creation, and I always enjoy seeing how the pieces turn out. In creating in this way, I develop and practice a greater sense of self-compassion too, because I'm not hard on myself if I paste a piece I've torn from a magazine in the "wrong" place, because I always paste something over it or bring in other pieces to compliment the misplaced piece if I really don't like how it looks, but that hasn't really happened in my collage process so far. I don't strive for a masterpiece, I simply create and create and enjoy the flow that comes with this freeing practice. I enjoy the energy it gives me, the inspiration it calls forth in me, and I enjoy sharing what I've created with others. So far I've worked on creating an inspirational collage art journal in the company of friends two times and both have been such wonderful experiences. I love seeing what others will come up with and feeling their inspiration levels rise at the same time.

My collage creative process reminds me of the balancing act of maintaining control of our responses in life while letting go of the need to control everything else. This is truly an art. I have dedicated this month of May to learning and practicing the art of surrender, and so far this daily focus has been so helpful when I run into a situation that I cannot control. I have also been using a new app I found called Mindfulness Daily that reminds me throughout the day to focus on the moment, notice how I'm feeling both physically and emotionally, and if there is anything beyond my control that I can accept for now. This last part has helped me practice letting go in the moment and has reminded me to take a breath and feel grateful throughout the day. I think the combination of dedicating time to express my creativity, along with focusing on what I can control in each moment is proving very helpful in remaining centered no matter what's going on around me.

These are several of my collage creations that I made on Sunday.

The Peace That Comes With Daily Practice

Looking back on the past four months through the lens of the daily practices I began on the first day of this year, I am awe-struck by all the creativity expressed, empowering research shared, and self-discoveries made in just the first third of the year! I think having a positive topic to focus on each day and post here has really given me a direction to take each day, no matter what happens throughout the day. Even when I'm stressed or super-busy or just plain tired, I try to carve away a few minutes for this practice, and I am enjoying the peace that is slowly coming to the surface as a result. This is not a "get-peace-fast" practice. It takes time. But the beauty of it is actually in the time it takes, because it gives me time to reflect at the end of each day and then at the end of each month on all the nuggets of wisdom I've found. And it gives me a new theme of growth to think about, plan, brainstorm about, read about, and affirm in me each month and each day.

I have also found it a bit easier to add on other small daily tasks. Not too many or not too complicated, because the tiredness factor really does need to be considered in, and self-compassion is key, no matter what. But little things like tracking what I eat again and taking my vitamins everyday again are easier to restart now that I have a regular daily practice. I don't feel the usual resistance I used to feel at times when thinking of adding one more thing to do to my plate. My daily practice of prayer/affirmation/visualization each morning also comes easier because it goes hand-in-hand with my daily focus. Also I have been writing about what I'm grateful for at the end of each day since the beginning of this year, and I find this very centering, and it's a calming way to end each day before going to sleep. If I'm too tired to write something though, I add it to my morning practice, which is also a soothing way to start the day. So it's a win-win either way; no need for guilt, only self-compassion and love here.

So what are the key ingredients to my 2014 life recipe so far?

• Creativity. A daily dose is best!
• Abundance. Coming from within, first and foremost.
• A dash of fun everyday!
• Season generously with self-love and compassion.
• Add grace to each of the other ingredients.
• Sprinkle with laughter, love, vulnerability, courage, faith, and joy.

Please note: follow this recipe everyday until it becomes second nature. This food for the soul can be addicting. :)

Like a Diamond, I Am Multifaceted

I am a multifaceted being and my dominant intent for being is for the experience of my freedom, for the expression of my growth, and for the receiving of my joy.

- Abraham-Hicks

Like a diamond, I am multifaceted. While reading Brene Brown's inspiring book, The Gifts of Imperfection earlier this year, I became aware of the option or opportunity to choose to identify myself with more than one title or role. Brene referenced a term called "The Slash," which is coined in the book, One Person/Multiple Careers, A New Model For Work/Life Success by Marci Alboher, who is an author/speaker/coach. Since then, I have started to really embrace my multiple interests, talents, passions and causes. For example, my "slashes" on my LinkedIn profile now read as follows: Certified Dependable Strengths Instructor/Creative Stress Management Blogger/Pre-College English Language Advisor. But I could easily add my other identities, such as "Freelance Nature Photographer" and "Dance Enthusiast;" the sky's the limit, because I'm a multifaceted being! We all are, if only we choose to see our many shiny sides.

I have also gained more power in pursuing my "hobbies" and reclaiming them as part of my multiple career identities and interests. My independent research on wellness topics and writing for this blog have also taken on a newfound importance and identity that I now include as one of my roles. This allows me to feel more freedom to be who I really am and not solely depend on one role or job to fulfill all my interests and passions. Learning that it's okay to be in multiple roles and identify my creative interests, in particular, as part of my greater calling or lifelong career is very empowering, freeing and inspiring. I no longer feel held back by a job title or duties that don't always utilize my most dependable strengths, because I can now name my various identities/callings, see real value in them, and seek out or create new opportunities to express my gifts and share them with the world. And in sharing my gifts, I feel that I'm creating a positive impact in others' lives and in my own.

If I catch myself feeling frustrated or tired or not in the flow of things, chances are it's because I've somehow forgotten or not had a chance to express my creativity lately, and with this awareness, I can now take action to feel more positive and more fulfilled by giving myself the gift of time for creativity. Whether it be for writing, taking nature pictures, collaging, dancing, singing in the car, visualizing, creating jewelry, or planning parties or workshops, being creative brings my soul great joy and peace.

I have found that in reframing or renaming the language of my already established traditional job title on my LinkedIn profile or personal email title, for example, I can better reflect on the richness of my career experiences and feel I'm moving forward on my path. But the joy of the "slash" is also that we can choose additional descriptions of what we do in our lives. A lot happens before and after the official business of work, and I believe that these activities are equally as important for our personal and professional development. Naming what I do outside of my official job brings a certain accountability to my creative work and I don't feel that it's an option anymore to stop working on my creativity. I know now that in order for my soul to shine, I must tap into my creative energies and let my heart sing through these activities. Because it's a part of my "job." My "job" here on Earth is what I create for myself and what I share with others.

What unofficial or non-traditional titles best describe your "extracurricular" gifts, talents, interests, and activities? Do you consider these activities a part of your identity?

Human beings are multifaceted jewels. We have many important dimensions to our being. These include the physical, emotional, mental, intellectual and the spiritual. Seek your perfection in all of these together, and neglect none. Seek balance and harmony in all aspects of yourself.

- Sri Dharma Pravartaka Acharya

I Am Whole.

I am love. 

I am whole. 

I am safe.

This was my mantra today during my dentist appointment, and it worked! I feel calm, thank goodness! I had a rather traumatic flashback of my open wound (from surgery over a year and a half ago) during my last dental visit, which motivated me to come to this appointment better prepared & equipped to handle any possible anxiety and fear with grace and love. And I am happy to report that I did it! (I feel almost like a little girl who was brave despite a scary event.)

I also realized as I was trying to visualize sunshine and puppies and beaches--word images that came to my mind at the last appointment after having an awful flashback triggered by the pain and needle for numbing the area in my mouth that they were going to work on--that the people who may have goofed up or didn't do as thorough of a job as we had hoped before, during and after my surgery 20 months ago, are only human. They were trying to help me; they weren't trying to hurt me or make me suffer. And coming from that place really makes me want to forgive each person who I have been holding responsible for a piece of the misery I went through. As Karen Salmansohn says in her awesome book, Instant Happy, we must reframe the stories of our lives. She writes that "mistakes = discoveries" and "anger and resentment = lessons in forgiveness." And I am definitely finding this to be true and the best remedy for letting go of painful memories and feelings.

As I type this on my little iPhone, from the dentist office parking lot, part of my nose is numb, and a little bit ago even my eye felt a little tingly. These sensations, instead of triggering traumatic memories, brought forth the desire to forgive those whose mistakes instigated incredible growth experiences for me. I didn't feel that way at the time or even a year after, but because of the post-traumatic stress I had at my last dental appointment, which came on all of the sudden and totally unexpected, out of the blue, I have now begun to shift my focus off of what happened and onto where I am going and how I can forgive and let go.

So here goes:

I forgive you, anesthesiologist and anesthesiologist-in-training, for not getting the epidural in the exact, correct spot, causing me to awake from surgery actually feeling half of my incision.

I forgive the hospital for not ridding the operation room and supplies of the pseudomonas bacteria.

I forgive the hospital administration who had my recovery wing under construction during my stay.

I forgive the worker who didn't read the orders correctly and gave me food on the first night, when in reality I couldn't eat until several days later.

I forgive the nurse who convinced me to take the catheter out after only a few days, which resulted in extreme pain and discomfort when they had to put it back in.

I forgive the doctors for not seeming very concerned about my 30 pounds of water weight obtained after 5 days in the hospital.

I forgive the doctor from the ER a week after going home who reopened my surgical wound without giving me anything for the pain he caused.

I forgive the medical staff and doctors who kept telling me my wound would heal in just a few more weeks, over and over again, as the weeks turned into months.

Breathe. 

I'm taking deep breaths during this writing session. It's painful to remember all these grievances but it's essential to get these memories out of my head and onto paper--or the screen in this case.

I am safe. I am whole. I am love.

As I remember these trying times in my life, it takes a lot of courage to write them down and share them, and it also takes a lot of courage to just sit with them and feel what I'm feeling and breathe into the painful memories, rather than avoiding them or running from them.

I cannot move forward if I continue to ignore these memories and feelings that have begun to pop up and break through the facade of "everything's better now" and show up in unexpected places like at the dentist. I believe my flashback served a very high purpose and that was to drive me to forgive by really looking at what happened and seeing the good intention of everyone during my surgical experience--they all wanted to help me. And they were trying to do what's best for me with the knowledge they had at the time. 

I forgive them. 

And I send them love and light.

Becoming Grace-Full

Over the years, I haven’t always felt graceful. (I even had an email account long ago that translated from Spanish into “Marita the Klutz.”) But when looking back at extremely difficult times in my life, I am awestruck by the amount of grace that filled my heart, helped me make the best of it all, and carried me through to an even more beautiful place than I could have ever imagined before I went through the darkness. 

Going through the darkness really teaches us to appreciate and honor the light when we see it again. If we had never been through those rocky times, we might not have noticed all the beauty around us today. It’s grace that we gain from walking through the dark. It’s grace that fills us up so we can reach a more appreciative and love-filled state of being. It’s grace that helps us forgive and move forward and heal. It’s grace that teaches us to live and love with our whole hearts.

In recognizing grace in our lives, we begin to feel more grace and when we're in need of it, we ask openly for the grace to get through it. Little by little, before we know it, we're filled with grace; we're grace-full. :)

 

Dear Pain

I had the privilege to write for my surgery sister, Elizabeth Katherine's blog recently and I wanted to share what I wrote her as well. This post was part of a series of "Letters to Pain" that Elizabeth Katherine featured this past month. You can read more about her journey on her blog, These Next 6 Months.

Dear Pain,

Since your chronic onset several years ago, I have done all I can to avoid you and get rid of you and this past year after having surgery, try to block you from my mind and not to think about you as much. But lately I have been reading about leaning into all of Life’s experiences and I realize that just as much as I want to lean into joyous moments, I must also learn to lean into difficult circumstances as well, and show kindness and compassion to even my inner critic or anxious thoughts or scared feelings or stabbing pain.

It has taken me a long time and a lot of reading and a lot of reflection to get to this point, and I’m far from mastering the “leaning in” tactic. I still find myself resisting the pain I experience, generally and thankfully only one or two days a month now, but this can also be applied to emotional pain, painful memories, and the trauma of what I have been through—of the hell I visited with stabbing pain, chronic achiness, major surgery, and open wounds.  When I feel myself squinch my face up and tense my entire body up, I am more aware now that I’m trying to fight the pain I’m feeling. Which seems totally logical, doesn’t it? Why wouldn’t we want to fight painful feelings? I’ve been taught to fight back, not bow down and let something take me over.

But from reading more about vulnerability and self-compassion from the great thinkers like Pema Chodron and Brene Brown, I am realizing that surrendering is very powerful and has VERY powerful effects on pain. I heard once at a 5-day silent meditation retreat that I went to several years ago that we should welcome ALL feelings into our being, like guests, but also know that they won’t be staying forever. The Guesthouse by Rumi is a wonderful poem about this.  I also love the quote from Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy (aka. SARK) which reads: “I’m learning to hold the little hands of those scared parts inside of myself, and just sit with them. They love this.” I want to challenge myself to try this even with pain. Because pain, for me, is connected to fear.

Quite frankly, I am afraid of pain. Always have been. I don’t like it. I feel so vulnerable—there’s that word again. So maybe something to try is to become more comfortable with feeling vulnerable.  I have a sticky note on my computer screen which reads “Perk up and lean in.” I heard it at a 2-day mindfulness training I attended last June. I love the metaphorical image it creates in my mind. I picture my kitty cat leaning into me so lovingly. I picture myself leaning into my beloved husband, trusting him completely and openly. I picture my future babies leaning into me with all the love in the world. I want to get to the point where I can lean into ALL circumstances and feelings I experience. It will definitely be a challenge, but I think even baby steps towards this will slowly add up and begin to build up my acceptance of vulnerability and pain and fear.

I cannot tell you how much reading and research I’ve done in search of a way of getting rid of fear, only to find out that the secret is actually to lean into it and befriend it, or at the very least acknowledge its existence and hold its hand. It is quite comforting when I do this.

Now the trick is to remember this the next time I experience pain.  My husband does a wonderful job reminding me to breathe and showing me unconditional love. Sometimes holding my kitty cat and hearing her purr soothes me and reminds me to slow down my breath.  Sometimes I begin to pray and ask for help from the Divine.

I think I will remember to lean in during difficult, painful times if I begin to practice leaning in with uncomfortable feelings that are less painful.  I have several weeks to go before my pain will return to pay me its now monthly visit, so I think I ought to start practicing with some of Life’s daily annoyances now.

But I also want to and must practice self-compassion, because when pain comes, if I don’t remember to lean in, if I get angry again with the pain, if I don’t feel very mindful in those desperate moments, I can at least show myself kindness and not judge myself for not feeling very graceful under these circumstances. We do the best we can and I certainly wouldn’t yell at a good friend for crying out in pain, so why don’t I extend that same kindness and compassion to myself?  Self-compassion is definitely a daily practice thing as well, so taking little steps to show myself more kindness may help me remember to be kind in moments when I don’t feel very graceful.

May I remember to show myself kindness in challenging moments, in all moments for that matter.  May I remember to lean in and make all my feelings feel welcome, rather than tense up and step away from the pain.

Respectfully and lovingly,

Maret

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of its furniture,

still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.

meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.

-- Jelaluddin Rumi,

translation by Coleman Barks

Learning To Laugh At Myself

I just attended a great class near my home by a laughologist named Donna Oiland.  Isn’t that a cool title?!  She was trained through The World Laughter Tour. It wasn’t a Laughter Yoga session or a laughter club, which I have wanted to try out for several years now, but it was about all the many benefits of laughter and different practical ways to become more purposeful with our laughter in our everyday lives.  The laughologist even suggested keeping a laughter journal.  I love this idea!  

On Sunday, I’m organizing an art party precisely to create collages or paper mosaics with inspirational phrases on the covers of notebooks to be used as gratitude journals, art journals, reflection journals--the sky’s the limit.  Now I think I know what theme I want my notebook to have this Sunday: laughter!  What a neat way to incorporate more laughter into my life and focus on laughing more often too.  

The laughologist recommended writing down or recording the moments when we have “mirthful belly laughter,” the times when you can barely breathe from laughing so much, when tears roll down your cheeks, when you might even snort, and when your stomach muscles hurt afterwards.  She also said that we can keep funny jokes or cartoons we find in the journal.  And the final piece she mentioned was recording stories of our most embarrassing moments.  This is because of the importance of learning to laugh at ourselves.  

Throughout the class, we were encouraged to share funny or embarrassing stories.  I thought of the importance of storytelling and sharing funny moments with loved ones, and I remembered a funny story I recently told my husband of a time when I was about 6 years old and my dad told me we were going to drive by a perfume factory.  He even said to roll down the window when we got close and take a big, deep breath.  Milliseconds later, I realized we were driving by a manure plant.  I think I cried!  I remember being really mad about being tricked AND being laughed at.  Thinking about this now funny memory made me realize how important it is to develop the ability to laugh at myself and not take myself too seriously.  

Donna Oiland described this as a gift of laughter for ourselves, to look for ways to laugh more, and take better care of ourselves as a result.  So today, for my self-love practice, I have gifted myself the time to laugh--at this class and now watching reruns of Friends and by creating a laughter journal this weekend.  I’m also grateful for the mirthful belly laughter my husband and I took part in two nights ago after a weekend snowshoeing trip.  We were a bit delirious from exhaustion but boy, did it feel good to laugh so hard tears rolled down my cheeks. :)  

When was the last time you laughed like that?